To Love a Rose: An Ethiopian Adoption Journal

Saturday, February 5, 2011

And Now We Wait

It just dawned on me today that I've been very forthcoming on this blog...and that it is pretty obvious to anyone who's been following it that I could know if I'm  newly pregnant (or not) within just about 14 days or so.  One of the less fun "side effects" of fertility treatments is the fact that the couple's ability to be romantic and spontaneous about certain bits of information is taken from them.  (I mean, how romantic can pregnancy news be when you got pregnant by injecting yourself with hormones in the stomach for a week, used vaginal suppositories to promote endometrium growth and progesterone levels, and literally had to time intercourse to within just the right hour to ensure conception?!) 

A lot of personal information?  Yes, I'm sorry - I know; but it has truly left me with a dilemma...when to tell that we've conceived...or not.  My initial plan was to be smart and wait out the first trimester before divulging that we're pregnant (if that is, indeed, the outcome); but what would I write on this blog?  How would I dance around that issue?  I'm not clever enough to think of some way to lie about it for three months...I'm just not.  Well, maybe I am, but maybe I just don't have the energy to think like that anymore.  I don't know.  Whatever the case, I'm trying to decide when and where and how much to tell.

I had all of these great ideas as to how to tell my family and friends that we were expecting one day; but with so many of them keeping tabs on this blog, it seems like a moot point now.  And that's a little disappointing to me, quite frankly.  Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut about the fact that we were starting fertility treatments, but I don't know about that either...I've truly enjoyed sharing my story and hearing other people's stories in return - so much love and hope and support in this arena of hopelessness and despair.  I'm grateful for all of those kind comments, prayers, and encouraging words!

So, when are we going to tell?  How are we going to deal with this?  Well, honestly, I have no clue.  The only thing I do know is that if everything "worked" this try, we will be due on October 28th, 2011.  That concept is absolutely blowing my mind!  We obviously don't want to be over-excited, because chances for failure are high; but still we are full of hope.

And now we wait...


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