A Truly Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all you dads out there!  Thanks for the strength and guidance and protection and hope and love and nurturing you rain down upon kiddos everywhere!  Dads are so important, and sometimes in this mommy-centric world, I think we tend to forget just how big your roles really are to the children you love and love you back. 

You are the rising sun.  You are the hero.  You are the safety zone.  You are the ladder.  You are the compass.  Without you, there is an unavoidable whole in a little one's heart.

So, thank you to all of you dads out there who didn't run, who are proud and stand tall and take initiative and look foolish with love for your kids or those you love like your own kids.  You make me smile and give me hope for the future.

And HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to the two very special men above (sorry, they never pose for a proper picture, argh!) - my dad and Mr. C.

No matter how far-fetched and wild our dreams, my father has always supported what my sisters and I have reached for in our lives.  He has been a constant source of guidance and is one of our biggest cheerleaders.  He has always expected a lot from us in every aspect of our lives, but has been the first to be forgiving and instructive when we've messed up or gotten off track.  I am so blessed to have him in my life.

Mr. C is the kindest person I know; he is always thinking about others.  His beautiful heart is most definitely going to make him an excellent father to Baby C; this is one lucky kiddo!  It's hard to believe as I write this, but this is our LAST Father's Day without our wee one (at least, without knowing who they are, etc.).  I cannot wait to see Mr. C embrace daddyhood; he's going to be a natural.

<3,
*m*

Yellow/Turquoise/Black and White Nursery Update

While Mr. C and I were home for two weeks back in April/May before mom's transplant, we did our best to add some things to Baby C's nursery.  It's hard for me at times, because I feel as though our entire planning process has been entirely muddled and our energies (obviously) spent in other areas.

I had an idea that this nursery was going to be amazing, bright, modern, and fun - a complete sanctuary of pure kid pleasure that any little one would LOVE spending time exploring and creating in.  But since we've been so back and forth, it hasn't really worked out like that.

We are both really looking forward to being able to devote some real time and energy to the decor in this room.  In the meantime, here's a look at what we got done while home last time.

We added the little book/toy shelf, but soon we are adding a whole wall of book shelves; so it will soon hold only toys.  The soft "tubs" are in bright teal; although on here it looks like a darker blue.

The "Alphabet City" print won't stay perched on top of the shelves, but will be hung above it.  I just wanted to get an idea of what it would look like.

Trying to decide whether to put this wall decal on the kiddos' level below the window or not.  It says, "In my world, everyone's a pony; and they all eat rainbows and poop butterflies. -Dr. Suess".  We LOVE it!

Some random artwork that we are going to hang on the wall  above the changing table/dresser.

Close up of two of the prints we bought from ReStyle Shop on Etsy.

This rocker used to be mine when I was little.  Can't decide whether to paint over it, or just leave it as it is and maybe put it in the living room.

I designed this for Desmond's (Baby C) nursery a while ago.  Mr. C did the hard work of interpreting my basic sketches into a true work of art; then, we had it printed on wrapped canvas.  It's a quote from Cervantes which says, "Faint heart never won fair lady."  I love the idea of Des being a chivalrous, little gentleman knight. :-)

Obviously, we still have A LOT of work to do; but I think it's starting to get there...

Love and Blessings,
*mandie*

Pictures from the Cancer Battlefield, Part 14: TRANSPLANT PARTY!

Today was mom's REbirthday!  All the months upon months of chemotherapy have been to get to this point - transplant.  God has been so good to her and all of us.  We know we have been blessed, and I know that we have learned to never take one single day of life for granted.

Mom's donor was in Europe (roughly 7 hours ahead of us); so, last night a little after midnight we started praying for him.  As it turns out, because of when the cells arrived here in Chicago, we can know that we were praying for the donor right around the time they were harvesting his stem cells 1/2 a world away - SO COOL!

The cells arrived earlier than expected (around 3 p.m.), and then were processed by the lab here at the CTCA.  At 5:54 p.m., mom's transplant began...and thus her new life of total restoration and divine health!

I will let the pictures below speak for themselves, but I want to reiterate how very grateful we are to mom's donor, her doctors, her nurses, her fellow stem cells patients and their families, and everyone here at the Cancer Treatment Center of America.  She was told her situation was hopeless (stage four Philadelphia positive adult acute lymphoblastic leukemia DOES seem pretty hopeless when looking through the eyes of the world); but they NEVER turned her away and NEVER gave up hope.

And of course, I have to thank God above for seeing her through.  He is Jehovah Rapha, "the God who heals you"; and He has made good on every promise He has made to my mother.  I am not naive, I know the outcome could have been different; so I rejoice every day that He has blessed us with more time together.

Both of mom's doctors got a bag like this.  Dr. Redei got a bottle of chocolate wine from our favorite coffee/wine shop in Branson, MO - Vintage Paris.  Dr. Abutalib got a bag of gourmet, cola-flavored coffee (his two faves are Pepsi and coffee).

Banner I made mom for her hospital room.

A closer view of the banner I made for mom.

Decorations above at head of her hospital bed.

Mr. C made a couple of these Eiffel Towers for mom's room.  The trophy in the back is from one of mom and dad's employee's sons.  Both boys race carts and gave their first trophies of the season to mom, because "She's a winner!"  SO adorable!

One side of mom's room.

The other side of mom's room.

Mom's doorway.

My attempt at drawing "la tour Eiffel" - haha!

Mom napping before transplant.  Her numbers were quite low today (which is normal and what they want), but she was very tired.

Words of inspiration from the chaplain.

Mom wearing the cute, pink mustache we got her.

Dad and mom taking a moment.

Channeling Inspector Poirot. ;-)

Mom and her nurse, Kim.

Mom and PCT, Lisa.

I made treat bags for all the nurses and doctors and other friends of ours around the hospital to celebrate mom's REbirthday.

Inside each bag was a hand-made chocolate mustache on a stick, a party noise-maker, a bag of Ghiradelli chocolate squares and Jelly Bellies in cappuccino and French vanilla flavors, and a stick-on mustache.

A few of the chocolate mustaches that Mr. C and I made.

We made cupcakes for the doctors and nurses.

Nancy, Kim, and Ron bringing in mom's donor's stem cells (ie: mom's new immune system)!

Making sure everything's right.

Mom was ZONKED during/after transplant!  LOTS of steroids and Benadryl given beforehand...she slept pretty much the entire time.  Prograf is anti-rejection medication.

Mom and the "three elves".

Mom and Dr. Redei - photo taken a few days ago when she was admitted for transplant.

Dr. Abutalib with his "cola coffee".

There were so many pictures from today and the past few days, I had a hard time choosing which to post here; but I hope you can see how joyful we all feel and are about this milestone in mom's healing journey.  Every day she is going to feel better and better!

We are so thankful to all of you for your support and continued prayers.  We will never be able to thank you enough!

Love and Blessings to You and Yours,
*mandie*

My Birthday Wish 2012

I'm writing this today (Tuesday the 15th), because mom is having a slew of pre-transplant tests done on my actual birthday (Thursday the 17th) that I really want/need to be present for.  So, I will be posting a link to this blog on Thursday before we head to the CTCA that morning.  *fingers crossed*

Also: The friends/families listed below do NOT know I'm doing this...I sincerely hope they are not offended by this, but rather are excited to accepted the gifts and blessings that I really hope are coming their way.  So, please know that these people did not solicit me to do this; I WANT to do this to help them out in some, small way.  Thank you.

As my birthday approached this year, family members and Mr. C kept asking me what I wanted for my birthday.  As usual, I wracked my brain trying to think of something I really wanted or needed.  Beyond finances for the adoption, there was nothing I could think of that I felt I truly, desperately wanted.

The only thing weighing on my heart right now are the people I've been touched by over these past few years.  My family is not the only one out there struggling with disease.  I have been blessed to have my life touched by so many old and new friends who are fighting their own good fight just as my family is.

So, it hit me that what would make me truly happy as I embark on my 31st year here on this planet would be if I could somehow go beyond what my own, insignificant hands can do and really reach out to my struggling and hurting friends.

This is what I'm asking of you, dear friend: could you, would you - please - take a minute of your time to write a card or letter to one of the following friends of mine who could really use your support right now?  Just a note to let them know that you're praying for them and thinking of them during this time.  If you feel so inclined, send them a gift card or check to help with bills, groceries, lunch somewhere other than the hospital, etc.  This is what I really want for my birthday, and it would mean the WORLD to me if you would do this for one of my friends. 

I will NOT be giving out these people's addresses (I just don't feel comfortable doing that without their permission); so, my plan is that you can send your cards and letters to me HERE:

Mandie Hickenbottom-Conner
2400 N. Samson Way
Apt. 1C
Waukegan, IL 60087


Then, I will forward them all on to the people you wrote to (and no, I WILL NOT be opening the cards - I will forward them on just as you send them to me).

PLEASE PUT THE NAME OF THE FAMILY/FRIEND YOU ARE WRITING TO ON THE BACK OF THE CARD/LETTER, THAT WAY I WILL KNOW WHO TO FORWARD THEM ON TO.

Here is my list of friends - choose one or all! :-)

THE GUERECA FAMILY:

If you've read my blog lately, you've probably read about my friend, Vince Guereca.  If not, you can read about his impact on my life here.  

Vince was a loving husband to his wife Silvia and devoted father to his four children Julie, Priscilla, Elliot, and Jesse.  And at only 36 years of age, it was hard for me to understand why our heavenly father decided to take him home; but as I've said before, there are many things I know I will not be privy to in this lifetime.

One thing I know is that Vince would never have left if he wasn't certain that his wife and kids would be taken care of properly.  While I know that their church, New Life in Chicago, is doing their best, the burden of being a single parent to four little humans ages 6 to 15 is a lot for anyone.

I know Silvia is smart and strong, but I also know that we are called to care for widows and orphans:

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." -James 1:27 (NIV)

So, I ask that you consider writing/donating to the Guereca family; for they are humble and most worthy.  

If you would like to donate directly to Silvia, a bank account has been set up specifically for donations:

Chase Bank, account #: 948075536

MARY DAY:

This is a photo of Mary and Jim Day.  I had the pleasure of meeting them at the cancer center where Jim was a stem cell patient like mom.  Sadly, Jim lost his fight with cancer not that long ago; and understandably, Mary has lost her best friend and partner in life.

Jim was a godly man who knew exactly where he was going and showed true strength of character and immense bravery until the very end.  He has inspired me to live without the fear of death (something I used to struggle with quite a bit), and I know I will never forget him.

Mary stayed by Jim's side night and day.  All of the nurses at the CTCA were deeply moved by her devotion to Jim, as was I.

I know without a doubt that Mary would love to hear from you - that you care, that you are thinking of her, that you are praying for her.

THE MELCHOIRRE FAMLY/BABYPAUL:

This sweet, little guy is Paul Melchoirre.  He was born to my college pal, Colleen, and her hubby, Dan.  Paul also just so happens to have been born with a heart condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome.  This has required baby Paul to undergo numerous surgeries followed by long stints in the NICU at Vanderbilt Children's Hospital in Nashville, TN.

Paul is a fighter, and I KNOW that God has an awesome purpose for his life.  As someone who understands days upon days spent in a hospital, I am sure that Colleen and Dan would appreciate your thinking of them with a nice gift card to someplace like Starbucks or another eatery like Panera where they could take a tiny break from the NICU and replenish their bodies and minds.  Just a card letting them know you care enough to think of/pray for their sweet boy would mean a lot to them, I'm sure.

GARY LEMASTER AND FAMILY:

This is my friend, CaryJean, and her dad, Gary.  Gary has been fighting pancreatic and now lung cancer for the past year or so.  This picture was taken at Cary's recent graduation from college.  A friend made sure that a private ceremony was held so that Gary could SEE his daughter graduate, as he could not have made it through the entire ceremony held for the public.

Cary and her mother, Valerie, are devoted to Gary during his treatments and recovery periods.  I know they would love to hear that you are thinking of Gary as he continues his radiation treatment in preparation for more surgery and chemotherapy.

There are so many more friends that I could place here today, but I don't want to overwhelm you all with choices; so for now, I will stick with these four options.

Again, please send all cards/letters/etc. to ME at the address above WITH the name of the family/person you are writing to on the back of the card so I know where to send it. 

I just want to THANK YOU all in advance from the bottom of my heart for doing this for me/my friends.  It is the BEST birthday gift I could ever receive, and I want you to know how much I appreciate it!

For those of you who don't know, mom's stem cell transplant will take place on May 23rd.  If you'd like to write her some encouraging words as well, you may write to the address above (just put her name in instead of mine) or you can send it directly to the CTCA here:

Kerry Hickenbottom

Cancer Treatment Center of America

Stem Cell Unit

2520 Elisha Ave.

Zion, IL 60099

Thank you again, friend!  I hope you have a blessed day!

All the Love in the World,

*mandie*

To ALL of You: HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

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Last year, I was definitely in a different place in regards to my feelings on Mother's Day.  I wrote this blog about the hurt I and so many infertile women feel from time to time about the holiday.

Oh what a difference one year can make!  There will probably always be a bit of my heart that remains broken from this infertility journey.  I can't wipe the truth away, but I can begin to mend...and I think I have.

This adoption has truly saved my sanity in a sense.  I'm still bitter at times that my body didn't give me a choice in this process, but I'm smart enough to know that I am greatly blessed to have the ability to adopt a precious child who will need me as much as I need him.

And then there is my own mother...

Mom at our apartment in Zion before heading to clinic.

I am BEYOND GRATEFUL that I get to celebrate another Mother's Day with her.  There was a time last fall when I wondered if I would, and it was the most terrifying time of my life.  I owe her everything - she stayed at home to be with my two younger sisters and myself while we grew up, and she encouraged us to be who we were meant to be and do what we loved.  There was never a distance too far for her to travel to make sure we had what we needed to succeed in life, and she would do anything for her children, husband, family, and friends.

Her stem cell transplant is set to take place on May 23rd, and we're throwing her a party on the stem cell unit floor.  I am so glad I get to be a part of her "rebirthday", and I look forward to celebrating many more with her.

I hope I can be as good of a mother to Des as she was (and is!) to me.  I am such a blessed daughter to have her in my life.


So, to all of you moms out there:

pregnant moms

first-time moms-to-be

foster moms

adoptive moms

first/birth moms

surrogate moms

egg donor moms

pet/fur moms

those who choose to not be moms but still have mom-hearts for others' kiddos

those who are hoping against hope that they get to be moms one day

auntie-moms

grandmoms/great-grandmoms/great-great-grandmoms and so on :-)

single moms

widowed moms

stay at home/work from home/work in and out of the home moms

granola moms/preppy moms/artsy moms/just trying to get by moms

moms who have experienced a loss (or more) whether in the womb or of an adult child

older moms/younger moms

teacher "moms"

Whoever you are...wherever you are...however you are a "mom"...I want to wish you a FABULOUS Mother's Day!  And I want you to know that God sees your heart.  He knows every selfless, loving act of kindness.  I believe great blessings come to those like you.  So know on this special day that you are loved and cherished and greatly prized.


Blessings and Much Love to ALL of You,
*mandie*